Tips to become Socially Confident

Okay first let’s get this straight, you have an important day upcoming and you are stressing about it. That is why you are searching up on the internet trying to find out tips and tricks to be socially confident.

Right!?

First and foremost, this means you are way too much in your head, obsessing about every little thing that could go wrong. So turn off those gears in your brain, they are not helping you in any way rather making you more anxious than you already are that’ll ultimately lead you to be less confident.

Deep down social anxiety and awkwardness come from a place of deep insecurity and the thought of not being good enough. This insecurity leads to a person being socially inept.

To overcome this issue, try these things to be socially confident !

1. Stop Overthinking

overthinking image
Source: Pinterest

Often the biggest impediments in our life are created by our minds. It can wander around and give us plenty to worry and fear about. The more you consciously think about being confident, the more you’re in your head. And the more you’re in your head, the more perturbed. Stop dwelling on all the negative thoughts. They are just mere perplexing trick your mind plays to deceive you.

Whenever you find yourself in a situation where you’re deliberately overthinking. Pause for a second, take 3 deep breaths, and continue. If you start to believe that it’s all gonna be okay, that is where the internal confidence will come from. Thinking nothing will and can go wrong gives a sense of composure and ultimately boost your sense of confidence.

Also Read – Signs that you are over stressed !!

 

2. Body language is the key to be socially confident

confident body language is key
Source: WellMedia.com

Usually, emotions get the best of us. These emotions lead to the production of neurotransmitters and hormones and make you feel exactly the way you think you should feel. if we are in a socially anxious situation, where lacking and competence can be a detriment, we overreact to our own mistakes leading to an incoherent movement that leads to us feeling like a dupe. In situations like these one can remain non-reactive asserting that one is not pressured by things happening around them.

Try to not be cramped up. Unclench your jaw, keep your shoulders back and stand straight shoulders width apart, don’t fidget. These movements lower the release of cortisol (the stress hormone) and release serotonin and dopamine, hormones associated with feeling good.
Free yourself, move around and get a good look at the room, be comfortable with your surroundings, smile to show that you’re interested, make eye contact.

Also Read: How to improve and maintain correct body posture

3. Learn from your mistakes

learning from mistakes leads to success
Source: WebMD

No one, not even a single person on this planet earth was born confident. But those who take the first step towards facing their fears are the ones who’ll grow and evolve. That being said, when you’ll start to face these fear of uncertainties. You are bound to make mistakes. But instead of being afraid of embarrassing yourself, see these mistakes as a learning opportunity. Mistakes are the best learning curves.

Note what made you awkward, what question made you want to run out of the situation. Observe these nuances and work on improving them. Maintain healthy expectations as building confidence takes time , slowly but surely your confidence will develop with more mistakes you make, and the more mistakes you make , more you’ll learn.

 

4. Accept yourself

body positivity
Source – Pinterest

We can’t be ourselves if we don’t know ourselves . Find some time for introspection , find out the things that bother you and hinder your growth. Self doubt might stem from the belief that you are obese, for some it’s being skinny, for some it’s the colour of their skin and for some it’s acne. By accepting the way you are you will be able to feel much more comfortable in your own self. Positive affirmation might sound cliché but can really help you in long term. Look at yourself in the mirror and say affirmations out loud.
For instance, say –

I am worthy of good things.
I’m fully in control of my emotions.
Everyone loves me for who I am.
I am grateful for everyday.
The best is yet to come.
I am CONFIDENT.

PS. Worrying about these insecurities is futile. No good can ever come from demeaning yourself. No one is watching you through a microscope, it’s only you who are. As a matter of fact, everyone is so much in their heads about themselves that they don’t even focus on your dilemma. So take a chill pill and go out there and overcome hurdles life’s throwing at you.

Also Read – How teenage questions themselves with their body image issues  

5. Play to your strengths

play to your strengths
Source – usatoday

Know the scores of a recent cricket match, have much better understanding of the current political issues of the world, know how to make the best chocolate cake. Whatever you’re good at, try to steer the conversations into topics that you have a great insight on. This way you’ll have a lot more to contribute to the conversation, leading you to feel more self confident.

 

6. Get uncomfortable to be confident

tweet showing how to be comfortable in an uncomfortable situation
Source – Twitter

In need to avoid suffering, we tend to stick to our old comfortable patterns of living. Change may be uncomfortable but that doesn’t make it negative. After all, the things that are comfortable are not always beneficial. This safe place however much affluent, can hinder your growth to be socially confident.

Make a list of things that intimidate you. Whether it’s ordering an espresso at a coffee shop, talking to strangers, speaking out your viewpoints in a meeting in front of a crowd. Start facing these impediments, one by one. Start with the easiest one and work your way up. At first, your mind would want to do anything in its power to find the easy way out. But stick through it and face the fears that are holding you down. It’s the only way for growth and being socially confident.

Also Read: 11 Ways to feel calm in the moment 

 

7. Never compare yourself

stop comparing yourself
Source – Pinterest

We usually see our friends excelling at things, being super confident in their own skin. For them talking to strangers is so grim when considered in our light. Seeing these notions, automatically make you to start comparing yourself with these people. It has been ingrained in the culture to try to keep up, but really there’s nothing to keep up to, and no one to keep up with.

Instead of comparing yourself to others try connecting yourself with others . The more connections you make, the more you learn about the world and yourself. There’s a lot of things we can learn but ourselves through our relationship with others. They’ll bring out sides of us we never knew existed .

Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, and celebrate your evolution. There is plenty to appreciate in the direction you are headed

Also Read – Why Indians need to stop seeking their parent’s approval

 

8. Speak clearly at a reasonable pace

speaking clearly can boost confidence
Source – Pinterest

Sometimes when nervous, one may begin to speak haphazardly. This not only makes you seem less confident but also its difficult for other to understand what you are trying to say.

To overcome this setback, try speaking in lower tones as studies show that raising your tone in the middle before returning it to a low tone creates profundity in your message and portrays confidence. If you find yourself speeding up or mumbling, take a pause and a breath before continuing.

 

9. Be a good listener

good listener to be confident
Source – Pinterest

When nervous one pays attention more to themselves and not what the other person is saying, which can make others feel as if you have no interest in the conversation.

Instead, focus on what the person is saying. Keep the conversation moving with apposite and contemplative responses. Let the other person speak, without interrupting them as it signals that you respect and care about their opinions which will give you better feedback as a good listener, ultimately boosting your self- confidence.

Also Read – How to appreciate your loved ones

Confidence is all about creating a positive outlook on yourself. Just know that the people you’re talking to, are humans just like you are. You don’t have to put them on a pedestal. Do not belittle yourself. See them and yourself in the same light. You are not in the background rather in front of the stage, ready to show the world who you are.

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